Judging and Giving Unsolicited Advice – I’m Guilty

What I learnt about judging and unsolicited advice after being at the receiving end of it.

Photo credit: symphony of love via VisualHunt / CC BY-SA

Life is an amazing thing and it gets more interesting when it throws one of its learning curves on you. My biggest life curve came when I moved to another country. My world of certainty or any other form of assurance suddenly went out the window. I found it very challenging and hard to adapt to the culture, the norms, and the routines. Everything was foreign to me. Life suddenly became a mess. Even though adapting and adjusting to a new country takes time, effort and acceptance, yet I felt I was thrown in the middle of the ocean in a boat with no paddles to row with.

When life puts you on the receiving end of it, it hurts a lot.

My journey is indeed very long and paved with much obstacle to overcome, yet I found something very interesting, hurtful and thought provoking.

In life I have certainly been guilty of judging and giving unsolicited advice without realizing the consequence of my action. When life puts you on the receiving end of it, it hurts a lot. You begin to question yourself and think why people do this. I believe we all partake in such actions without giving it much thought.

After being at the receiving end of many judging eyes and unsolicited advice givers, I began to realize that I was guilty of this as well. Just because we do something without thinking of its consequences doesn’t make it right.

To myself and all those who indulge in such, here’s what I learned………

– Every person’s pain is different, to say that you understand does not mean that you can understand their pain 100 %.

– Every person deals with the test and trials of life in a different way. Don’t judge them based on your own subjective thinking.

– Every person during their difficult times needs more empathy than uninvited advice.

– Sometimes the best advice is no advice at all.

– Give a listening ear than unwanted advice. You may be shocked at the amount of goodness it can bring.

– Unsolicited advice can be of value, but not all the time.

– Give a person the benefit of a doubt, before judging them.

– People cannot tell their whole stories all the time, so don’t judge them.

– People are not looking for advice all the time, sometimes they need to find the answers by themselves.

– It’s simple, if people want counsel they will ask.

– People who give undesired advice usually come out as arrogant.

– Unsolicited advice is called unsolicited for a reason.

– Be of service to people, instead of judging them.

– Judging others shows more self centeredness than care.

We can always learn from our mistakes.
Let’s rise above it.
We can do it.
We must.

P.S. Have something to say. No worries. We got you covered. Share your thoughts in the comments below.

P.S.S. We like difference of opinion as well. Don’t be shy and write what you feel.




3 Replies to “Judging and Giving Unsolicited Advice – I’m Guilty”

  1. Great thoughts here! We have all been guilty of offering unsolicited advice at some point but thankfully I am more mindful of my ways now. Have been at the receiving end most of my life and know how horribly annoying it can get.

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